A Letter To My Boys

Dear EO and YO,

Today, I did something I haven't done in a long time...I stopped and smelled the roses. Now before you, my curious, questioning, precious EO, ask me, "Where Mamma? Where are the roses? And where did you stop Mamma?"; and you my adorable little Bengali-Babu-turning-English YO ask, "Vere rojhejh, Mamma?", let me inform you that I'm being metaphorical. (I'm not going to explain this huge, big word to you now, because I'm hoping that by the time you read this, you'll know what it means. If not, look it up in the dictionary!).

I was sitting amidst a pile of books, papers and magazines, and sorting them out. You EO, were at school, thanks to yesterday's strike. You YO, were sitting nearby, quietly playing with your toys. Suddenly, it started to rain. You looked up and out the window, YO, and excitedly said, "Beeshti! Mamma, beeshti poachchey!!"

I am drawn to the rains. The grey clouds, the pitter-patter, the cool wetness of the air...they all do something to me. So I scooped you up in my arms, YO, sat you down on the window ledge and stood behind you, my arms wrapped tightly around your little body. We talked excitedly about how the trees were getting wet because the world was getting a bath. After our excitement calmed down a bit, we silently watched the rain fall. No words; just silently drinking in the sight, breathing in the atmosphere and totally being in the moment that was. At one point, you leaned right into me and I felt you give out a sigh of absolute contentment. If that wasn't enough to make my insides explode with a joyous, yet quiet sense of happiness, you suddenly looked up at me, reached towards my face and kissed me on both cheeks. The happiness engulfed me whole!

Bonding over cloud-bursts and rain-fall. I don't remember the last time I did this with you, my EO. And YO, this is the first time I really, truly sat back and watched with you, I think.

These moments. These are the moments that remind me about the many blessings of motherhood.

Sigh... You're both growing up so fast. Too fast!! You need to slow down so that Mamma can catch up.

And Mamma needs to stop and smell the roses more. Or at least watch the rain wash the trees. Or at least listen to the birds sing. Or watch the clouds drift by; or the stars puncture the velvet, black coat of night. I need to do this more often. And with you.

So here's to rain-fall, birdsong and star-light. Here's to many more such moments with you.

And always know that I love you both more than you'll ever know!!

Mamma