For those of you who have been praying,...

...you can stop now.

My father passed away on Wednesday; 20th January, 2010. Saraswati Puja.

There is much I will need to write so that I can remember. Because I never want to forget.

But right now, I am devastated. It hurts like hell. There's a scream that's going on and on inside me and I don't think it'll ever stop.

Ever.

It's a New Year...

...full of new hopes, dreams and prayers.


But as we move into 2010, may we not forget the blessings of the year gone by.


I have much to say, but for now, I just want to thank you all and wish your and yours, a wonderful year ahead full of light, love and laughter. Make new memories and friends. Do something you've never done before but have always wanted to. Forgive someone. Get in touch with a relative you haven't seen for a while. Have that extra piece of chocolate, do ten extra push-ups. Sing, dance, write, paint, create...and above all -- LIVE!!

M4 needs...

prayers and an endless stream of positive energy. Above all she needs faith. And HOPE.

For she is floundering.

Please. PLEASE help...

They said...

...that it's obstructive jaundice, caused by a blockage in the bile duct, which therefore causes bile build-up.

He'd been looking sick for a while now. It was as if he was shrinking in front of my very eyes. It's so difficult to watch your parents age. It's even more difficult to finally acknowledge that fact to yourself.

Now the blockage can be caused by either a stone or a tumour. 95% of the time it's a stone.

My father is not in the 95%.

Why???

Why is it so hard to be honest?
Why speak in half-truths?
Why insult my intelligence?

I'm kinda heart-broken today...and hating it :-(

EO Speak & YO Speak

M4 is lying down next to the YO and getting in as many cuddles as she could get.

M4 (mushy-mummy-ly) : Tumi aamaar ke? (exact translation coming up so it does sound icky: Who are you to me?)
YO: YO (says his name)
M4: Naa, tumi aamaar chhotto baby. (No, you're my little baby.)
YO: Naa, aami tomaar YO. (No, I'm your YO.)
M4: Taaholey aamaar chhotto baby ke? (Then who's my little baby?)
YO: EO dada.
M4: Naa to. EO dada aamaar boro baby, aar tumi aamaar chhotto baby. (No...EO dada is my big baby and you are my little baby.)
YO: Naaaaaaaaa! Aami ekhon boro hoyey gechi, aami chhotto baby naa! (Noooooooo! I've grown up now, I'm not a little baby!)
M4: Tumi koto boro hoyey gechcho? (How big are you now?)
YO: Eto, dekho... (This much, see...) {and he proceeds to extend his arms above his head, hands spread the width of a full-grown cat, apart} Aami puro big boy. (I'm totally a big boy now.)

Ok my baby, even though you have no concept of size, length and width, if you insist, then you are a 'big boy' now. Sigh!!! :-(
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M4 treated her boys to a Domino's Pizza dinner, since they were sad about their Mamu leaving.

At the table, EO, though stuffed, is eyeing the last two slices of pizza in the box.
EO: Mamma, can I have that for tiffin tomorrow?
M4: No baba, you've already had too much. Tomorrow, I'm packing a banana in your tiffin box.

A debate ensues over which fruit to pack. Then the EO pipes up again, but naturally, since he's a fighter that one, and will keep trying with various lines of logic. Also, he loves getting in the last word...

EO: But Mamma, pizza is full of vegeytebils and cheese. So it's healthy. It's a healthy junk food, ok Maa?

Aaahh, my little one! You have no idea how many people, the world over, are waiting for the creative discovery of this wondrous thing called 'healthy junk food'...your Mamma being one of them!

So Says the EO

"But why does Mamu have to go back? I don't want him to go!", states a very teary-eyed EO.

M4: Because he needs to go back to office, my shona.
EO: Then I'll go to Ameyrica and bring the full office to here.

M4 sighs and says o herself,"If only, my sweet. If only."
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The MIM, to EO: You know naa, that your Mamu is leaving tomorrow?
EO: Yes. And I'm sad. I'll miss him for ONE HUNDRED days!!

M4 overhears the conversation, sighs and says to herself, "Me too, my sweet. Me too."