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Mother, writer and daydreamer. Also chocoholic and chick-flick lover. But mainly mommy. To two boys, at that! When not escorting my Elder One (EO) to karate class, I'm trying to get in as many cuddles as possible from my Younger One (YO). And when not doing either, I'm hard-at-work trying to maintain a steady relationship with my laptop. And as for the Man I Married (MIM), well, let’s just put it this way – even though we share a bedroom, our most meaningful conversations are held over the cell-phone!

Monday, June 15, 2009

These are a few of my favourite things...

As all of you have noticed, I've been in a deadly, depressing kind of funk the last two weeks and all for reasons domestic. Let's just say that I let this certain person get the better of me all the time and I invariably end up drowning in negative energy and self-pity.

Also, my FIL had to be hospitalised while the MIM, boys and I were on our first ever trip abroad. We went to Phuket on the 31st and were due back to Kolkata, via a three-night stop-over in Bagkok on the 10th. On the 2nd, he was very critical and my MIL told us that she thought it best if we came back...just in case. The poor MIM was distraught and I was shaking with fear. We couldn't get a flight on the 3rd, but landed back home on the 4th. Luckily, and with greatest thanks to God above, the FIL came out of it, weak, but at least he's back home now.

With so much happening, I found myself sinking in a quagmire of nasty emotions and misery. And the feelings stuck to me like the humidity, sweat and grime of Calcutta's pollution, so I just couldn't seem to shake it off...until two things.

I took my mom to a place called Dakshinapan...this is a lovely, shopping complex where all the emporiums are. We went to Rajasthali and somehow, seeing the fabrics there and the colours and the prints, vivid memories of the girl I used to be just came rushing back. I was flooded with the person I was and how I used to dress...khadi kurtas, ethnic prints, handloom materials, tribal jewelry, big bindis, boho skirts, colourful jholas... I rocked that look. It was me, all me, pure and unadulterated ME!! Why did I let her go? I don't have a penchant for labels and designer names, so why do I get excited whenever certain items at Ritu's are in discount...and that too, the ugly ones?!? Why do I get upset that I can't wear noodle-straps and boob tubes? I never could! They don't suit me or my personality. I'm a very Indian-looking girl, oops, woman. I should just stick to what suits me best. Are my khadi kurta and faded jeans days over just because I left JNU a decade ago? No, not if I don't want them to be. Not by a long shot!!

The second incident happened when I was passing through Saturday Club and I got a whiff of chlorine coming from the pool. I actually stopped and breathed it all in...deeply, almost sinfully, like a lover's scent. And I got such a high! It made me feel vibrant and alive and I realised just how much I love and miss swimming. It rejuvenates me, it makes me feel whole and fresh. I should start swimming again, not just for weighty reasons aesthetic, but because I love it.

So now that these two incidents have kicked me out of my abyss of despair for the time being, I've decided to make a list of some of my favourite things. Things that put the sun into sunny-side-up...

~ My sons' laughter. A tickle fest, or a round of funny faces and the sweet sound of their pure, innocent laughter takes me straight-away to Mommy Heaven.
~ Chocolate.
~ Music, Music, Music. Specifically jazz, Rabindrasangeet, Masakalli, Prem Joshua.
~ Poetry.
~ Sweet, juicy strawberries; ripe, tangy kiwis.
~ Boiled corn. Roasted corn. Corn.
~ Cooking and feeding other people.
~ Rainy days.
~ Black'n'white Bengali movies, especially the oeuvre of Satyajit Ray.
~ Chick-flicks.
~ Art-house cinema.
~ Art.
~ Books.
~ Perfume. Especially from Lancome and Estee Lauder.
~ You. Yes, you all, my blog friends. Even though I may not have been blogging, I faithfully followed you all. Thank you for letting me into your lives and sharing. Without you all, in these past few days, I may not have recovered my sanity.

And now, won't you share your lists with me?


Piper .. said...

:) Hey..I`m so glad you could put all the negativity behind you. Sometimes its the little things in life that bring the most joy.
I perfectly understand the state of being bogged down by negative forces all around you. But all you have to do is to concentrate on what keeps you going, not on what tends to pull you down. Easier said than done, I suppose.
Dakhinapan is one of my fav haunts at Kolkata too. Even this time around when I was just so off track, all I needed was to sit on the steps of Madhusudhan Mancha and sipa hot cup of chai..alone.
Shall do a post on my fav things too :)

Goofy Mumma said...

Wow! So happy to hear that you are over that. Cheers. Now go and get yourself those beautiful ethenic clothes, and put them on and flaunt them the way you truly can. Happy to hear that your FIL is back home. Hope he is all healthy and fine soon enough. Glad to see you back!

Mystic Margarita said...

Sometimes the universe conspires to get us down, to drown us in a quagmire of negativity like you said. But again, the same universe also brings us face to face with things we love and cherish - things that make us us. And I am so glad that you have broken the circle of negative forces and reclaimed yourself! And girl, bright, vibrant colors, textured fabrics, boho skirts, khadi kurtas, bindis are so you - I bet you'll rock them again like you did during the JNU days. And do start swimming again as well, na!

And I am so happy to hear that your FIL is better and back home. And glad to have you back :)

Anonymous said...

Its great to have you back!! :)
I've been following you're blog for quite sometime. And though we've never met, I feel a kinship. Am glad that you've put the negativity behind you. That's where it should be - behind you.

You're such a chipper happy person. Dont ever let things bog you down again. I know, easier said than done. :)

Looking fwd to some regular posts, and some pics of you in those lovely ethnic clothes!

Here's to you girl!

Still thinking said...

I'm glad you're feeling better M4.

May the fragrant smell of 'Pleasures' surround you always :p


Poppins said...

Your dresses sound so vibrant! Why would you ever want to exchange that for the drab colours of western wear? :)

Sorry to hear that your trip was cut short by illness, really sad. Hope your FIL is recovering well now.

What are my favorite things?
-Late night gupshup with friends
-Sitting on a terrace with the wind in my face
-Dancing to gay abandon with the kids
-so much more..!

Mama - Mia said...

welcome back woman! you were missed! and good to hear your FIL doing better.

ofcos best is to know you getting back to being yourself! :)

what are my fav things?

cuddling for just those 5mins before you wake up (extended sessions are always welcome).

seeing Cubby smile and laugh and change so much all the time.

dark chocolates, good food and perfumes (when i can afford them)

time spent with friends



AD said...

Hey, first time here and have become an instant follower :-) I love swimming too and am waiting for a tiny bit of sun here to jump into my pool.

Anonymous said...

missed your last post and was just wondering about that when I saw this one:))
what a beautiful, nostalgic post :)))

you know what?I sometimes feel as if the khadi kurta faded jeans days are slipping away from me too...
I want to hold them and never let them go...

swimming?will ti be too weird if I say me too?
I miss much..I was a water baby completely..I can out swim the best..and yet I dont know by I haven't been anywhere near a pool since...since I dont remember when:(

your fav things are very you :))
just the way I picture you to be from your words:))

you know I would say ditto ..:))the exact same list (except that I am not very familiar with Rabindra sangeet )
but the list ?would be EXACTLY the same:)))

glad to hear that your FIL is fine now:))

((hugs))gods bless you and yours:))

Monika,Ansh said...

Love your attitude M4. Gotta learn that for keeping my own sanity.

Glad that you FIL is better.

Anonymous said...

Oho, trust you to get out of your moody blues just when I was about to suggest black-n-white Meghe dhaaka taara! :P

But seriously, am glad you've come out of the blues, happy and bright - lets steal these precious moments of joy and live them up! The blues may follow, but lets stay a step ahead

Have fun and stay blessed!

Devil May Care said...

To Missy Jazz mommy :)

P.S I love your blog!!

Pipette's Mimi said...

Hey M4,
I came here after a long time..My ILs were in town..
hopefully you are feeling better now..Loved your list,BTW!

Anonymous said...

Its been two years since I gave up on my faded jeans, kurtas n jholas n ganga dhaba ki chai n I miss them like crazy...not many understand tht look but it was one hell of a style n time n life :)


noon said...

MM - Thanks for commenting on my previous post. Nice to know you are still there! :) I enjoyed this post...from the heart sort of thing.
And those are some of my favorite things too. Except perfumes - but occasionally I do like those too - I like the "pleasures" perfume from EL. Try it if you have not. A child's laughter - nothing like it ever to make one cheer up.

chandni said...

oye! u from JNU? Had no idea!